Wakey Wakey, Part Two

I told Jeremiah that I was trapped. I think that freaked him out, but that was how I felt. I just needed to go somewhere. I was tired of being here in Phoenix. I needed to move.

So a few weeks ago, we started planning. Time-wise, Jeremiah would only be able to take a few days off. Plus, the dogs. And cats. We decided the dogs would come with us and the cats would stay home. It took forever, but we also decided (the morning of) that we would be heading towards Petrified Forest National Park. I'd wanted to go since I drove past it with my dad nearly six years ago. Plus, that way we could stop in Winslow, Arizona.

We woke up on Tuesday, packed a suitcase (plus books, maps, guides, gps, etc.), packed supplies for the dogs, and took off to the gas station. Holy crap, gas got expensive, didn't it?

Anyway, being that my car is still new to me, I wasn't keen on the idea of Jeremiah driving. So I drove. About ninety miles. Then we hit the hills/mountains and I was screaming and white-knuckling the steering wheel and my eyes were closed and Jeremiah was all, "Um, maybe it's time I drive. You know, for the safety of the four lives in this car." So I pulled over at a small gas station and he took over.

For the rest of the trip.

Be careful what you wish for, babe.

Anyway, here we go on our picture journey.

First, we decided that if the dogs were comfortable, we probably would be happier, too. So we packed the dog bed that they love. 

Atticus is wearing his harness. I LOVE this harness, as it is breathable and does not cause him to lose fur or get red, irritated skin.

Seeing snow in AZ is pretty much the highlight of any trip. I get way too excited.

 So this sign just ticks me off. I kept saying to Jeremiah, "Any minute now, we're going to see one of those beasts - an elk or moose or whatever that is!!!" and guess what, Friends? We never did. Not one. Except at one point I think I might have seen one. It shall now be infamously referred to as "The Elk Shrub". And stop laughing Jeremiah, it totally could have been an elk. You don't know.

 Friends, I know for a fact that I've posted pictures of the tall grass like this before. But it seriously is so cool and I just love it.

Jeremiah: This is one long straight-ass road. Emily: Yes it is! I am going to take another picture!

 And then we reached a point where it was flat, with orange ground and blue sky. It was kind of awesome.

 The scene in the backseat looked like this. How can you not MELT when you see that little face?

Way out in the middle of nowhere, we passed this building. I guessed prison, because what a perfect place for criminals. If you escape, you're screwed. There's nothing else out here. I guessed right. I always do.

 We reached Winslow, Arizona. We stopped and GPS'ed the exact corner of Jackson Browne. I am not at all ashamed to share that we totally touristed it up.

"Standing on the corner of Winslow, Arizona..."

I was all, "Let's stay there on the way back!"

 Okay. We passed this HUGE HUGE HUGE power plant. I think it was nuclear. I am not sure. I CAN tell you with certainty that I prayed for it not to explode the entire time it was in sight. It was way intimidating. I didn't care for it.

But I did love the tacky dinosaurs and made Jeremiah slow way down. The street next to this was named Bloody Bucket Street, which I am pretty sure is the most awesome street name EVER.

We could have stayed here, too. But we did not. I am glad. When we stopped for gas next door on the way home I saw drunks stumbling back from the bar. Not my scene.

This is my scene. And I have a DQ story for the next part of this picture trip.

 We are going to end here for today. Mostly because I am tired of explaining each picture. And a little because PNF is so cool it doesn't deserve to be with my pictures of tacky touristy stuff. Although I can't promise that some of that won't sneak into the next post.

Lonely Men + Hookers = Jerome

As I mentioned earlier, we took a day trip up to Jerome. Jerome was a booming mining town in the 1800s and early 1900s. The company that mined made something like 60,000,000 in mining! Holy crap. Anyway, the men got lonely so they had lots of saloons and lots of working women (if you know what I mean). The town is very cool. We are early birds, so we left...early. And by the way - if one were ever to take a trip to Jerome, I recommend going EARLY because the people start to roll in around noon and it gets super over the top touristy. And who wants that?

We stopped at Dunkin' Donuts, which was a true bummer. I only get doughnuts on roadtrips and these doughnuts were not worthy. So sad. I miss Wesco.

Anyway, let's get on with the pictures!

Here we are heading north of PHX.
Some saguaros, which take my breath away. EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.
Heading through the mountain...
...Reaching the top.

Beautiful clouds.
Boyfriend. Driving.
CLOUDS!!!!
I thought this one was cool. Clouds + Jerome = Happy Emily
It started to get twisty and turn-y and I started getting nervous and there was NO sort of guardrail. So I focused on the clouds instead.
I just like this.
Twist.
Waiting for our turn at a one lane part of the road.
Fence in Jerome.

I like this one, too!

And finally, Jerome, city in the mountain!

Anyone else planning any fun trips?

A Day in the Life, or, Day Tripper

I'm sure that some of you are thinking, "I've seen the inside of her house. I've seen the outside of the house, but I've yet to see AZ." Well, buckle up, people, because we are taking a road trip! Are you excited? We were. What could get two people that dislike Phoenix out into Phoenix? Record Store Day. Yep. This is our second-annual trip to Record Store Day. Held on the exact same day as Gay Pride Day in Phoenix. That's not a problem because I really like the flags. I mapped out the whole day on my GPS, Gus. Here's the day: Ikea (I needed picture frames), Lush (I always go when we hit Scottsdale), Harry & David (butt munches were out of their Easter candy), Revolver records, and Zia Records.
I didn't drive. Jeremiah doesn't like to drive my car (I think it's a jealousy/comfort thing. He isn't used to a comfortable car), so we took the Ford. Now, the above picture shows what happens when you don't listen to Gus. Gus told us to stay to the left, stay to the left, exit left, exit left, damn it. But we didn't, because really? What idiots put exits on the left side of the highway? The idiots in the great state of AZ, apparently. So the picture is what happens when you get off the highway in the wrong part of town. I was going to take a picture of a man with his shopping cart full of treasures, but he was changing out of his morning wear (just shucking some layers) into his day wear and don't we all deserve a bit of privacy for that?
'Kay. Back on track. City view on the way from Lush in Scottsdale to Revolver. Can I just say? I was on a roll in the coffee shop in Scottsdale. J. even told me to knock it off. I mean, really though. Do you need to wear your sunglasses in a dimly lit cafe? Do you need to wear platform wedges when you are eighty? One false move and that old chickie would be bed ridden with a broken hip. Relax, people.
Jeremiah was so sweet when we left the mall, though. As we approached his car in the parking garage (filled with foreign cars...totally should have taken my car!) he made a "bleep bleep" noise to mimic automatic car locks. He didn't want me to feel left out.
Here we are going through some mountains. If you feel so inclined, there are bike paths (I tried mountain biking once. I went over the handlebars. I cried. I was bruised and bloody. There was a great deal of pouting and swearing. I figure I don't need to go again.) as well as hiking paths.
There's also the Desert Botanical Gardens in case you wonder what the desert might look like. You can pay $20 and see the desert. We've actually done this, not out of curiosity to see the desert (because, duh) but because we were feeling all culture-y and wanted to see the Chihuly exhibit (which, by the way, reminds me - I am totally going to have Jeremiah start wearing an eye patch over his blind eye. Maybe then the girl at the deli won't have to worry about me jumping over the counter and attacking her as she gushes about how much MY boyfriend looks like David Bowie. Shut up, meat girl. If you keep saying nice things like that then I'm going to have to say nice things to him. He'll start to expect it. That might have been the last time we went to that grocery store. Or it might have been the time when I saw a guy with a gun in the meat department. Or the time when we shopped with someone else's grocery cart. We'll have to discuss this another time).
Here's a nice city scape. It looks nice from a distance, no?

GPS in PHX, or, I Hear Voices, or, I Once Was Lost but Now Am Found

So for Christmas, my dad got me this:
That is the adapter, GPS, and a thing to set it in because I don't want anything stuck to my dash or window.
I take all these things into the car and that way I won't get so lost. You need this, too, if you can say yes to any of the following:
1. You live in a big, ghetto-y city.
2. You travel a lot.
3. You like maps.
4. You need maps.
5. You get lost all the time.
6. Your directions (either the ones you give or receive) sound like this, "You know that Burger King on the corner? Turn there. Left, I think. Or maybe right."

Seriously, I just grab it...

...and into the car we go. I'll admit, it took me awhile to get it set up. My brother swore up and down that a monkey could use it. Not this monkey. I'll get back to this in a second. For now, I'm digressing again.

I had great intentions getting it out and looking through it, but I didn't. It took great fear - read: getting lost on the way home after dropping J-Dog off at the airport at four in the morning. I didn't want to roll around in south Phoenix in the dark. Alone. In an old, untrustworthy Ford (boyfriend's car). I wanted to live just a bit longer. I ALWAYS get lost on the way home from the airport. It's seriously the most messed up airport EVER. Kind of like the city, but I digress on my digression. So I didn't want to be driving around lost and because of that I got out the GPS. Turned it on. Set up a password.

Which brings me back to my brother's "A monkey can do it." - I tried to manage my GPS, but it doesn't work with a Mac. I had to use a (pause) different computer. A red one. Boyfriend's. So this monkey was a bit cranky and felt silly that she couldn't get it to work. But technically, it wasn't my fault, right? I should mention that you don't have to set it up on your computer. You can just turn it on and go. But being who I am (obsessive and controlling. It's okay, I can admit it.) I had to manage it first.

So on to the drive. I set it up. It told us where to go. Exactly. Several times. It told us when we were speeding, estimated arrival (which changes based on speed - fun!), I could see crossroads, miles to go, minutes to go, EVERYTHING. And then it did my lesson plans and made me an early breakfast. Seriously, I fell in love so much I almost asked it to marry me. It probably would have said yes and then planned the whole flippin' wedding, because that is how wonderfully organized this gizmo is.

One of my favorite things about it? It blinks if you tick it off. Jeremiah almost missed the exit on the way there - it comes up super fast and the off ramp is short - and it started blinking furiously and repeating itself. Sounded like a female Rainman.

I think I'm going to see if I can't find a voice that swears. I like swearing and it would make a trip even more fun and lighthearted if I could hear (and excuse my language, I never swear on here) "Geez, bitch, you missed your turn. Dumbass. Now I have to re-analyze the route." Wouldn't that be great? I think so.

And by the way - We purposefully missed a turn and it completely reroutes you. Which is great if you can't get off the motorway in time.

On a side note, the voices in my head? The real deal. You've already been introduced. Em, Emily, and Emilie. I figure Em is fun and lighthearted, Emily is no nonsense and logical, and Emilie is my European, artsy, sarcastic chickie. She has been in charge of most of the redecorating. And my need for hats and scarves. And the small dogs. And my snotty side. That's my girl. I figure they all add up to the one wonderful me. You want to hear voices? Set down your cell phone. Lordy with the cell phones, people.

But again, this was about GPS. The voices outside my head. You should get one. We all think so.