Why, Kristen Stewart, Why?

Just a couple of random thoughts floating around today.

First, Kristen Stewart, this is for you. Why do you always look like you are in pain? In every single Twilight movie your mouth is hanging open a little bit. You are either A) Hurt or B)Trying not to smell a fart so you are breathing through your mouth instead of your nose. I get that. I teach little kids. I do the mouth breathing sometimes. But I am guessing that Robert P. smells divine, so close your mouth. And also? The movies are so bad that they pain me, Kristen. They really do. But it's like a car crash, I have to watch them all. And as I am a horrible girlfriend that apparently makes everyone feel sorry for Jeremiah, he ends up watching them, too. I don't make him, I promise. He just likes to laugh. And then I have to tell him to shut up because I can't hear you mouth breathe and mumble while he's laughing. Okay, Kristen, I am done. Oh, just kidding. You are looking much more beautiful in the Breaking Dawn P. 1 than in your previous films. I just wanted you to know that. Kudos to you.

Friends, yesterday was so craptastic I can't even stand it. I started out the day by dancing a jig, which is saying something when you wake up at 4:00 and then again for realsies at 4:45 every single day and then start teaching at 7:20 instead of 8:00 every single day. So the jig was special. I jinxed the day with my effing jig. Stupid jig. And the thing is, most of the crappy stuff didn't even happen to me. It happened to my students. And I love my students, so this breaks my heart.

Plus, I *almost* hurt someone at work yesterday and I think that is frowned upon. Like, I don't think I am allowed to punch someone in the throat. Totally inappropriate behavior/words coming from an adult that should know better. Shame on you. 

To top it off, the lice are rampant at school. I am now sure that I have lice. 99.9% sure. I can feel them every single second. Moving around. I dream of them in my hair. I wake up terrified. This is part of OCD, Friends. And it sucks. If I had had the energy yesterday, I would have told Jeremiah to do a check. But at this point, with me being certain of the lice (that in my head I know probably aren't really there), I don't want to check and find out that they are there for suresies. For now the lice and I co-exist. As they attack my scalp. But the nasty thing is, even if I did have Jeremiah check, he'd have to check again. I will be having him do regular checks until my mind finds something about which it can obsess.

It is times like these when I wish I was a drinker, but I am not. So I cannot say, "Boy, I will go home and have a nice glass of wine." because I won't. I can't even say, "Boy, I am going to go home and have some gummy eggs." because I ate the bag Jeremiah gave me for our anniversary and he won't tell me where he hid the other bags and they are ALL OUT at the World Market. So really I am without an outlet.

Any suggestions?

P.S. I would like Jeremiah to learn how to make a proper mixed drink, but that seems to be a no-go. Plus, he isn't allowed to use the blender.