Oh, Albert!

My class and I have a pet.

This is interesting mostly because we did not purchase said pet.

Also it is interesting because it is not a pet that I would ever choose.

We have a lizard.

I found him at about seven p.m. on a Thursday night in early December. Right here:

 I screamed quite loudly and yelled for the teacher next door. Yes, we are too lazy to use the phone or walk outside to the other person's room. We just yell. Anyway, in the end I figured that I have had roaches, mice, and huge amounts of crickets in my room. A lizard seemed kind of minor in comparison. Plus, the number of crickets has gone way down, so bonus, you know?

When I told the students about Albert, they were excited. We named him Albert Einstein. In reality it could easily be Alberta, because I'm not really up on my lizards.

Here we have a close-up shot:

It seems that little Albert has become a bit more social in the past few weeks. I am seeing him out and about more. Walking over to my bag and seeing a lizard crawl out still makes me jump. The kids are careful when they move about the room. Or put on their coats. Last week Al was hanging out on someone's sweater.  Earlier today I rolled my wheelie chair over a cord and gasped as I thought I had shortened poor Al's already short life. So I'm not sure if he's feeling frisky or what, but the dude is everywhere. *

The highlight of my day today (besides, you know, changing the future by inspiring minds) was after I came over to my desk and Albert scuttled out from behind some papers I looked at him and said on a sigh, "Oh, Albert." and shook my head. And then I realized that I had become that person that speaks to lizards. That speaks to lizards as though they are human.

That's worse than a crazy cat lady by about a million.

*Yes, I have realized that Albert could actually be AlbertS, but I am refusing to entertain that possibility because then not only would there be a lot of creepers in my room, but also because then I would be the loony lizard lady.

Wakey, Wakey Part 3 - The Final Episode

The final part of the trip lands us in Petrified National Forest. All my normal exaggerations aside, this place was incredible. Humbling.  I might have gushed a bit. Jeremiah's response to my gushing? "Dirt is 225 million years old. Do you feel humbled by dirt?" I think he was just cranky because he had been driving so long.

We started at the park entrance and then headed through, following the map and narrow road for the twenty-eight (?) mile route. At first we didn't see much petrification of wood around us and I was getting miffed. We only had an hour before the park closed and I was feeling discouraged. The painted mountains were gorgeous, though. So some perks.

In the above picture, I'm not sure if there was a fire and the stuff on the rocks was ashy stuff or if it was mossy stuff. Didn't really seem to be an environment conducive to moss.

This was totally intimidating to drive next to. Especially when you could see huge boulders that had already slid down the side.

Finally on the side of the road, I saw some petrified wood. I screeched to Jeremiah that he should "Stop the damn car!" and I hopped out and took some pictures.

All around the chunks of petrified wood are little (pocket-sized) pieces. I have never in my life wanted to steal as badly as I did at these moments. I'd get back in the car and Jeremiah would say, "Did you put some in your pocket?" All accusingly like. My response was "Do I look happy like I just stole something? No. I do not." Jeremiah's nature/park motto is "Leave only footprints, take only memories." which is posted at Effie Yeaw near where he lived in California. So he is my annoying conscience. Not that I would really steal, but holy crap it is tempting to take a piece of 225 million year old history.

The pieces don't look huge, but they are:

A little background for you:

We stopped at this tourist shop to get a postcard for my grandma. I get her a postcard on every trip I take.

We spent the night in a shady hotel. I actually saw a man smoking a non-plant-based material in a pipe outside while I was waiting for Jeremiah to get our room. I have never hopped over into a driver's seat so fast in my life. Seriously, I could have won a medal. I wanted to be able to leave the scene if I needed to.

I should mention that the dogs did fine on the travels, but it would have been much easier to travel without them, especially Spike. In the car, fine. In the hotel, barking. Not so great. Although, I don't think that that was the biggest concern with regards to our hotel.

The next day we headed for home, this time through Flag.

We are celebrating our 100 year birthday this year in Arizona.

Liars. Big fat ugly liars. I didn't even believe them on the way home. I scoffed at their signs.

I might have screamed a bit on the way home. Mountain driving is a beast. You are right next to the rail, where you can see little crosses put up in memory of those who did not make it back down the mountain.

Plus, you can see the semis heading north UP the mountain. One wrong move, and you are toast. I hope those drivers think about that. My life is in their hands.

When they redid the highway, they decorated/arranged the rocks to make it look pretty.

Here's our sign celebrating Arizona's birthday. Palm trees replace the mountains from the earlier shot.

Home sweet home.

Anyone else take any trips lately?

p.s. Dairy Queen story - On the way home, we stopped at a DQ that we visit nearly every time we head up to Flag/Sedona/Jerome/Wherever. The guy asked us if we wanted dog dishes. They were free, he told us. Not knowing exactly what a dog dish was, we said yes anyway. Mostly because I am in love with free stuff. He gave each of the dogs their own little dish of ice cream. Good Lord, those were some happy dogs. Spike was like the owl in the Tootsie Roll commercial, where the owl says "How many licks to the center of a tootsie roll pop? One, two, three!" and then the owl bites the pop. Spike took about three licks and then just ate the whole ice cream at once. Atticus, on the other hand, did delicate little licks while sitting on my lap. He kept looking up at me and his little whiskers and chin had ice cream all over. Took him a good five minutes. So cute.

Wakey Wakey, Part Two

I told Jeremiah that I was trapped. I think that freaked him out, but that was how I felt. I just needed to go somewhere. I was tired of being here in Phoenix. I needed to move.

So a few weeks ago, we started planning. Time-wise, Jeremiah would only be able to take a few days off. Plus, the dogs. And cats. We decided the dogs would come with us and the cats would stay home. It took forever, but we also decided (the morning of) that we would be heading towards Petrified Forest National Park. I'd wanted to go since I drove past it with my dad nearly six years ago. Plus, that way we could stop in Winslow, Arizona.

We woke up on Tuesday, packed a suitcase (plus books, maps, guides, gps, etc.), packed supplies for the dogs, and took off to the gas station. Holy crap, gas got expensive, didn't it?

Anyway, being that my car is still new to me, I wasn't keen on the idea of Jeremiah driving. So I drove. About ninety miles. Then we hit the hills/mountains and I was screaming and white-knuckling the steering wheel and my eyes were closed and Jeremiah was all, "Um, maybe it's time I drive. You know, for the safety of the four lives in this car." So I pulled over at a small gas station and he took over.

For the rest of the trip.

Be careful what you wish for, babe.

Anyway, here we go on our picture journey.

First, we decided that if the dogs were comfortable, we probably would be happier, too. So we packed the dog bed that they love. 

Atticus is wearing his harness. I LOVE this harness, as it is breathable and does not cause him to lose fur or get red, irritated skin.

Seeing snow in AZ is pretty much the highlight of any trip. I get way too excited.

 So this sign just ticks me off. I kept saying to Jeremiah, "Any minute now, we're going to see one of those beasts - an elk or moose or whatever that is!!!" and guess what, Friends? We never did. Not one. Except at one point I think I might have seen one. It shall now be infamously referred to as "The Elk Shrub". And stop laughing Jeremiah, it totally could have been an elk. You don't know.

 Friends, I know for a fact that I've posted pictures of the tall grass like this before. But it seriously is so cool and I just love it.

Jeremiah: This is one long straight-ass road. Emily: Yes it is! I am going to take another picture!

 And then we reached a point where it was flat, with orange ground and blue sky. It was kind of awesome.

 The scene in the backseat looked like this. How can you not MELT when you see that little face?

Way out in the middle of nowhere, we passed this building. I guessed prison, because what a perfect place for criminals. If you escape, you're screwed. There's nothing else out here. I guessed right. I always do.

 We reached Winslow, Arizona. We stopped and GPS'ed the exact corner of Jackson Browne. I am not at all ashamed to share that we totally touristed it up.

"Standing on the corner of Winslow, Arizona..."

I was all, "Let's stay there on the way back!"

 Okay. We passed this HUGE HUGE HUGE power plant. I think it was nuclear. I am not sure. I CAN tell you with certainty that I prayed for it not to explode the entire time it was in sight. It was way intimidating. I didn't care for it.

But I did love the tacky dinosaurs and made Jeremiah slow way down. The street next to this was named Bloody Bucket Street, which I am pretty sure is the most awesome street name EVER.

We could have stayed here, too. But we did not. I am glad. When we stopped for gas next door on the way home I saw drunks stumbling back from the bar. Not my scene.

This is my scene. And I have a DQ story for the next part of this picture trip.

 We are going to end here for today. Mostly because I am tired of explaining each picture. And a little because PNF is so cool it doesn't deserve to be with my pictures of tacky touristy stuff. Although I can't promise that some of that won't sneak into the next post.

Road Trippin' It to Tucson

Tucson flew by. Seriously, it was a quick week. I made a movie (!) and won a classroom of laptops for a month - one for each student. So it was a good week.
On Thursday a friend/coworker and I went for a walk on one of the resort's trails. I spotted the above bird on the way back and I'm pretty sure it is either a female cardinal or a pyrrhuloxia. Say that three times fast. Or even once. Typing it was even troublesome.
View from the path. Gorgeous, non? So much prettier than the mountains in PHX.
Then there was this pretty bird. BRIGHT yellowish-orange. He was either some type of oriole, not a midwestern variety, or he was some type of warbler. But I don't think warbler, because he was livin' large, you know? If you know, feel free to comment. Or lurk. Go ahead.
Hawk on the pole. Bird on a wire.
The maze.
The resort was nice, it was the second time the conference was held there. The rooms are all in little clusters - all outside. A little like rich people camping.
More views.

And that was my trip to Tucson. Not the city so much as a resort visit, but fun all the same.

A Day in the Life, or, Day Tripper

I'm sure that some of you are thinking, "I've seen the inside of her house. I've seen the outside of the house, but I've yet to see AZ." Well, buckle up, people, because we are taking a road trip! Are you excited? We were. What could get two people that dislike Phoenix out into Phoenix? Record Store Day. Yep. This is our second-annual trip to Record Store Day. Held on the exact same day as Gay Pride Day in Phoenix. That's not a problem because I really like the flags. I mapped out the whole day on my GPS, Gus. Here's the day: Ikea (I needed picture frames), Lush (I always go when we hit Scottsdale), Harry & David (butt munches were out of their Easter candy), Revolver records, and Zia Records.
I didn't drive. Jeremiah doesn't like to drive my car (I think it's a jealousy/comfort thing. He isn't used to a comfortable car), so we took the Ford. Now, the above picture shows what happens when you don't listen to Gus. Gus told us to stay to the left, stay to the left, exit left, exit left, damn it. But we didn't, because really? What idiots put exits on the left side of the highway? The idiots in the great state of AZ, apparently. So the picture is what happens when you get off the highway in the wrong part of town. I was going to take a picture of a man with his shopping cart full of treasures, but he was changing out of his morning wear (just shucking some layers) into his day wear and don't we all deserve a bit of privacy for that?
'Kay. Back on track. City view on the way from Lush in Scottsdale to Revolver. Can I just say? I was on a roll in the coffee shop in Scottsdale. J. even told me to knock it off. I mean, really though. Do you need to wear your sunglasses in a dimly lit cafe? Do you need to wear platform wedges when you are eighty? One false move and that old chickie would be bed ridden with a broken hip. Relax, people.
Jeremiah was so sweet when we left the mall, though. As we approached his car in the parking garage (filled with foreign cars...totally should have taken my car!) he made a "bleep bleep" noise to mimic automatic car locks. He didn't want me to feel left out.
Here we are going through some mountains. If you feel so inclined, there are bike paths (I tried mountain biking once. I went over the handlebars. I cried. I was bruised and bloody. There was a great deal of pouting and swearing. I figure I don't need to go again.) as well as hiking paths.
There's also the Desert Botanical Gardens in case you wonder what the desert might look like. You can pay $20 and see the desert. We've actually done this, not out of curiosity to see the desert (because, duh) but because we were feeling all culture-y and wanted to see the Chihuly exhibit (which, by the way, reminds me - I am totally going to have Jeremiah start wearing an eye patch over his blind eye. Maybe then the girl at the deli won't have to worry about me jumping over the counter and attacking her as she gushes about how much MY boyfriend looks like David Bowie. Shut up, meat girl. If you keep saying nice things like that then I'm going to have to say nice things to him. He'll start to expect it. That might have been the last time we went to that grocery store. Or it might have been the time when I saw a guy with a gun in the meat department. Or the time when we shopped with someone else's grocery cart. We'll have to discuss this another time).
Here's a nice city scape. It looks nice from a distance, no?