2.08.2013

Boogers - Bathroom Series, Part 1

They built us new bathrooms when they did the school remodel. That's fantastic, right? As far as community bathrooms go, this one is pretty nice.

In early fall, I walked into my favorite stall and noticed what appeared to be a booger on the wall of the stall. I am very easily disturbed by other people's icky things, and I was only able to calm myself down by the fact that the booger would be erased forever when the bathrooms were cleaned that evening.

The next day, the booger was still there.

For over a week, this booger held steadfast to its spot on the wall. Eventually, I took an empty toilet paper roll (This makes it sound like our bathrooms are never cleaned, doesn't it? Not the case, I promise.) and used that as my weapon to remove the booger.

Not ONE FREAKING WEEK LATER, a new booger was smeared on the wall. Who the hell does this? It has to be an adult woman, as it is the staff bathroom. And really, Friends? What better place to pick your nose because not only is it private, but there is toilet paper RIGHT THERE for you to use as booger holders. Use the toilet paper. Please, I beg of you.

Same story, did not get taken care of, I used my shoe, yadda yadda.

Last Friday I went into my favorite stall and there was another booger smeared on the wall. I did not take care of it. I just want to write a note and post it in the stall. My mental letter goes something like this:

Dear Booger-Wiper,
What the hell is wrong with you? This is the adult bathroom. We do not wipe boogers on the wall. Actually, my third graders don't even wipe boogers on the wall. There is plenty of toilet paper here, use that. If you can't handle disposing of your nose gold properly, I would suggest you use a different bathroom.
Sincerely,
A Kleenex-User


I can't even comprehend this disgustingness.

Someone, anyone, please share a job related story for me that will make me feel better about this situation.

2.04.2013

Yep, She Sure Is.

I know what you are thinking. That is a freaking cute cat, Emily. Yep, she sure is. She is adorable.


She is also the cat that actually looks around a room in an effort to eff things up. Sometimes I swear I see her doing that. Like, "Hmm...What can I destroy next?" It is not enough that she climbs the tree. She sabotages the tree take down, as well. She hates it when Christmas goes away.

I get you, Maddie, I do. I hate saying goodbye to Christmas, too. But this is not the way to show it.



 For sure this is a cat that wants to eff up your Christmas:



P.S. I should add that Maddie really just wants to have fun. I think she might be a friend of Cyndi Lauper's. She is not malicious in her destruction, which sounds weird, but I believe it to be true. I think of her as an individual with ADD with a spectrum disorder (We've got some social awkwardness going on here, people.) thrown in for good measure. That is my cat.

2.01.2013

Only Got Twenty Dollars in My Pocket

If you know me or have been reading for awhile, you know that I am a thrifter. Almost everything in our house? Second hand. It started out of necessity. I moved here to Arizona with two cars worth of stuff - and that did not include dining room furniture, a couch, chairs, or a bed (for the record, I would never buy a second-hand mattress. Just...no.).

I needed stuff and I was not exactly swimming in money. So I started shopping at Salvation Army and Goodwill. With my Subaru, I could haul everything. Seriously. You know. Everything.

When we bought the house, we needed to fill it. As I mentioned, nearly everything is second hand. And we like it. We like to think we make it look good. At least to us. Some pieces we refinish, some we just clean up, but it has been fun slowly adding things to our house over time, instead of getting everything all at once.

Friday a cool thing happened. YHL, a blog that I read, decided to have a thrift store challenge. It was based on this song by Macklemore & Ryan.



I love that Leona is in that video. She was also featured on the front cover of Martha Stuart's Living a few months ago. Everyone loves them some giraffe. You can read about how I found Leona the Giraffe here. And you really should. It is one of my favorite posts.

The challenge is this: Take twenty bucks, go to a thrift shop, see what you can get. Also, take a picture of yourself with something mentioned in the song.

So here goes:

 The first stop we made was the Salvation Army. It was raining in Phoenix, and while I generally like the rain, I've been fighting something (again.) and was not going to stand in the rain while Jeremiah perfected his shot. So here it is. From inside Hazel.
 My found object was this mustard yellow (or as my brother would call it - Felicia Brown) Samsonite ("Oh! Samsonite! We were waaaaay off!") piece of luggage. Mostly I thought - this is some ugly shit. But at the same time, I was like, "I could totally buy this and never have to grab the wrong piece of luggage at the airport carousel again."

I got a few stares while posing with the suitcase.



Salvation Army was having the one year anniversary of their store remodel, and it was freaking packed. Mostly because everything was fifty percent off, but also because they were grilling hot dogs in the rain. You don't really have a Plan B here in Phoenix in case of rain. You just don't.

Anyway, I bought three books at a quarter a piece. The bottom three on the pile above.

Remember my pig head that I have had for years?

I totally found his water-loving friend! He was only two bucks, and he is so ugly that I love him. One of his eyes is slightly darker than the other, which is endearing. If a fake white duck head can be endearing. And I think that they can be.

Total spent: $2:75

Our next step was Goodwill, and it was packed and everything was also fifty percent off. I scored a Jones New York 3/4 length grey boatneck shirt, a light grey dressy tee, and a pair of long navy sporty shorts. I would show pictures, but all clothes are being decontaminated at the moment. I also got the rest of the books in the above picture.

My total spent at Goodwill: About $12.00.

Jeremiah walked up to me while I was searching and said he had found a belt. Apparently he has been looking for a casual black belt (I am sure at one point I told him his black leather belt was too dressy for some of his pants/shorts. That totally sounds like something I would say. With love, of course.) Anyway, he strolls up and says he's found a belt and it looks brand new. Had I ever heard of this brand? Holds up the tag. It's a Patagonia belt. This one, actually. He was excited to learn that he could open a beer bottle with it. Thirty dollar belt. Jeremiah's total: $2.00.

I didn't have any huge or super exciting finds (besides my duck and books), but I still like seeing what's new and what bargains are available. I can't really narrow down any particular favorite or best find - Leona was definitely up there. I have also had some great clothing finds and some great furniture finds. Like the tables I got for $1.25 each and refinished. Jeremiah has had some incredible finds - including $100 pants and ties for just a couple of dollars.

So there is my response to the challenge. Anyone else do the challenge? Anyone have a favorite thrift shop find?