Jeremiah came home yesterday and when he opened the door, stepped into water. Like, splashy splash.

Laundry room? Floor covered in water.

Hall? Floor covered in water.

Living room? Floor covered in water.

Closest? Floor covered in water.

Bathroom? Two soaking wet dogs, a flood, and a toilet pipe with a hole in it spraying water all over the place.

I am going to focus on the positives. That Jeremiah had a half day simply because he had to use up his paid time off or they would have taken it. Had he been later, it could have been much worse. For the dogs AND the house.

Another positive? That we tore out the carpet to finish the concrete. So nothing is ruined. Except maybe some towels. And a few rugs. But I am NOT going to focus on that.

Also, I am not going to focus on the fact that the reason that the house flooded was because one of the dogs chewed on a label attached to the tube that runs water to the toilet and in the innocent act of chewing the tag chewed holes through the tube.

Little Bastards.

I know my dogs can't talk, but here is how I imagine THAT conversation going:

Atticus: With a Hispanic accent - Ohmygod, Spike! I want to tear that tag! That tag looks like fun! Oh, I am going to do it! Tears/chews tag with wild abandon.
Spike: Geez, Atticus. That DOES look like fun, but I am so freaking thirsty.
Atticus: Wild, crazy laughter - Ahahahahahaha! Ohmygosh! This is so fun! Merry Christmas!
Spike: X
Atticus: More wild & crazy laughter. Then, Whoosh! Chews through the tube. Water spraying everywhere.
Spike: This is fantastic! I LOVE to drink water! Drinks water for a few minutes.
Atticus: Ohmygosh! I hate water! I hate it! Merry Christmas!
Spike: Okaaaaay, Atticus. Turn off the water now. My feet AND my belly are all wet. Now let's just use our opposable thumbs to turn off the valve...Oh, shit.

I realize that probably that was only funny to me. Maybe Jeremiah. That is okay.


Jeremiah said...


Oh, Abigail! said...

I cannot express how much I love the fact you specified an accent for your dog!

Emily said...


Emily said...

Oh, Abigail, yes. I am one of "those people". My chihuahua has a Hispanic accent, my Dachshund has a congested lisp, and our cats end every sentence with "meow". But it sounds like you are perhaps understanding my weirdness.

Thanks for reading!